Things My Students Draw (part whatever)

Oh man, you guys. It's good to be back. Back from what, you ask? Intensives, that's what. For the last four weeks, I've been getting up way too early (7 am, like normal working people!) so that I can teach a three hour novel class. It was actually really fun. The kids were smart, the book (The Ear, the Eye, and the Arm) was good, and, when class was all over, the school fed me some pretty delicious Korean food. Plus there's all that extra money I've just made. But the downside was a significant decrease in my overall energy and creative output. I have now worked from 9 am to 10 pm, and I can safely say that it sucks and I do not ever want to make a habit of it.


So while it was great to hang out with super smart and energetic kids who insisted on attacking me at every opportunity, it's even better to be back to my old habit of sleeping in until noon and staying out late. I can proudly say that I've regressed back to college hours.

But enough with the boring details of my life! Let's get to the main attraction, the artwork of some truly inspired Korean children.

Or, in the words of student-drawn cartoon Theresa Teacher, "Rock n' Roll!"

Let's start off with some truly terrible story-telling. For this project, students were supposed to tell the story of a group of people trying to escape North Korea. Unfortunately, these students were a bunch of sadistic middle schoolers.

"Family tried to escape from North Korea. There is father, mother, sister, and brother in family. They escape at night."

Okay, that's pretty normal...

"Family tried to escape, but their mom told to police where are they. Police saw them, so they ran and ran. However, police caught family and shoot gun."

Oh no! Will they live???

Father, son, daughter died from police. Father hurt head, daughter hurt stomach, and son hurt important area.

That was oddly specific. And horrible.

But if that was bad, the next submission was far worse. The story these boys told me went something like this: "North Korea super gay. Kim Jong Eun want all men love him. But these men not want love him, so they want escape to South Korea where they can find girlfriend. But Kim Jong Eun know, so he send guards to shoot men with rainbow guns. So they shoot them and they die. The end." Here's a picture of evil gay dictator, Kim Jong Eun.

Fashionista!

 Middle school boys are terrible.

A few weeks ago, we had a class on food taboos in various cultures. We talked about how Hindus don't eat beef, how Muslims and Jews don't eat pork (shock from all students that anyone could find pork undesirable), and how Europeans and Americans don't eat dog. This was the day when I discovered just how many of my students love the taste of dog.
Anyway, for the presentation at the end of class, the students were asked to pick a strange food and talk about why or why not people eat it and decide if they themselves would eat it. One student took this as his golden opportunity to do what every student has dreamed of doing.

So now there's a picture of poop hanging on my classroom wall.

Another project asked for students to draw a picture of their emotions. My favorite one is below. It's actually pretty deep.

"This drawing is teach us don't rely on money. Money isn't the best. And the blue box is the things that are really important. And money could turn and kill you."

Like, literally. A giant 100 million dollar bill will come out of the sky and kill you. And giant, flaming quarters will rain from the sky to destroy your civilization.

Speaking of the end of the world, I'm pretty sure something crazy happened and created some mutant babies.

Professor Baby!

Mutant Super Baby!

Cat Caby!

 And the one baby to rule them all...

Gangster Pimp Baby!

Gangster Pimp Baby may be the greatest thing to have ever come out of my classes. Gangster Pimp Baby (also known as GPB), likes to drink, smoke, gamble, and shoot guns. He has lots of tattoos, and in order to legally look at him, you have to be over the age of 19. He also has lots of women.

Finally, I leave you with a poem that one of my students wrote:

Father
And
Mother say
I am always
Looking at
You
 
Beautiful. Go now, with the blessings of GPB.